You just found out that your friend is pregnant, it was unintended and she is struggling with what to do. You may be feeling a lot of different emotions: relief, perhaps, that it’s not you; concerned, because she is in school or just landed that perfect job; or worry, because you care about her. But you are unsure of how to help her through an unintended pregnancy. These are all very normal feelings to have and you may experience different feelings throughout this situation. Let’s talk about how you can help…
These days so many of us are quick to speak and slow to listen. It’s easy to make a situation about ourselves and we fail to slow down and listen. Take time to really hear how the unintended pregnancy is affecting your friend and allow her room to process her situation.
Be a Safe Person
Avoid sharing your friend’s unintended pregnancy and situation with others. It’s her news to share and she may not want anyone to know. * Be careful here, spreading her private information may cause you to lose a friend.
Check in on her and find out how she is doing. Ask her questions about how she is doing. Try to avoid the question, “What are you going to do about your unintended pregnancy?” This may make her feel panicked and add fire to an already stressful situation. Some questions you may consider asking: How are you feeling about being pregnant? How can I help?
Avoid “If It Were Me…”
We are all unique individuals. This is not a time to announce what you would do if you were in her situation. Try to steer the conversation back to how she is feeling about being pregnant and how you can help her. If she presses the question, “What would you do if you were me,” then…
Encourage Her to Get Help
If your friend is struggling, encourage her to seek help. Sometimes we need a safe place, or person, to help us through a difficult situation like unintended pregnancy. Encourage her to speak with the father of the baby (if possible), and if she is a minor, her parents or guardians. Consider suggesting she go to AVA Care, we are the experts on unintended pregnancy. Encourage her to take her time and not make a hasty decision. This would include confirming she’s pregnant through an ultrasound, and receiving information about all her options. Offer her our number, 540.434.7528, or tell her to schedule an appointment online. Our staff understands the difficulty of facing an unintended pregnancy. We believe that information empowers, and strive to provide her with objective pregnancy and sexual health education so she can make a confident and informed decision, if she has a positive test. We provide free pregnancy testing and confirmation – so she knows for sure. Trained professionals are available who can answer her questions and discuss her situation. Here is a link to our services.
Above all, be there for your friend. Helping her through the process shows that she is loved and supported. We can’t take away stressful situations in our friends’ lives, but we can help manage them in a healthy way.
“No one is more cherished in this world than someone
who lightens the burden of another.” – Anonymous
AVA Care is here to Advocate for you, Validate your concerns and provide Answers to your questions. We are here for you – no matter what you decide. Schedule an appointment online or call 540.434.7528 today.
Dr. Teresa Klansek
The content on this page has been reviewed and approved by our Medical Director Dr. Teresa Klansek.